When in a country that consists of malls and condominiums, where the weather, even in the cooler seasons, is a humid 360° full-body blast furnace, 24×7x365, you’re best off with a stiff dose of air conditioning, because even doing nothing will turn you into a torrid, dripping sweaty mess within seconds. Then again, the moment you step outside, your clothes will seem to be disintegrating and sticking to the very fabric of your pores, to say nothing of how you’ll feel the moment you actually engage in any physical exercise, such as, I don’t know, carrying groceries, walking, blinking, whatnot.
So what does that leave us with? Sex, idleness and food seem like pretty obvious candidates for passing the time (those, and spending days on end in overly cold lecture halls at your friendly neighborhood business school. I don’t know what it is about hot countries that makes them feel they have to turn any indoor space, and even some that aren’t, into subtropical versions of Iceland in January. It smacks of borderline sociocultural schizophrenia, seeing people running around carrying parasols with sweaters tied to the grip for the moment they set foot in their local icicleville.) Sex is out, particularly if your girlfriend is on the other side of the world (and you’re surrounded by repressed locals and ladyboys), idleness — well, that pretty much translates to beaches, and if you’re Singapore, there’s Sentosa with its entry fee and artificial sand stretches from where you can watch the colorful sheen of leaked container ship fuel oil bobbing on the waves.
So, food. Food, and company — especially when you’re surrounded by a horde of short-timers on a tropical escape from the bracing cold of the French winter.)
Oosh is, for me, typical of the best that a place like Singapore, with all its plasticky Disneyesque artificiality, can and should come up with. Considering they’ve let whatever colonial cultural and architectural heritage (probably not much, considering this place was a malarial, fly-blown pesthole not 50 years ago) slide to hell, then tore it down and put up several generations of shiny condominium parks on top of it, the fact that there exist verdant, reasonably quiet areas in which to place a bar/restaurant that’s not either on the 50th floor of something or inundated by bored-looking hipsters, is pretty remarkable.
The service is sweet-but-mediocre, like in most “good” places we went to in Singapore. Nobody will so much as blow their nose without a work order, in triplicate, but staffers are generally caught in a weird triad of either (a) completely apathetic, (b) officiously formal, or (c) terribly sweet and welcoming. It can go all across the board, really. But when they’re nice, they’re really really nice.
Like our waiter — not terribly competent, but once my ultra-French friend Bertrand gave him a good friendly talking to about not stressing so much when removing peoples’ plates, he wised up. Or getting them to relax about letting people smoke 1 meter outside the smoking zone (an arbitrarily designated area) — although maybe that was just due to them being tired of dealing with a bunch of inebriated Europeans. They were very sporting about letting some of our guys do very bad karaoke, to the chagrin of the non-barbarian patrons.
Nonetheless, the evening was tremendously pleasant, the environment (outdoors, dark, quiet, natural, fragrant, mmh) was beautiful, especially the water fountain, and the food was excellent. I ordered grilled baby octopus and stingray (always excellent), preceded by a river prawn salad. Funny enough, the grilled portions were half the price and twice the size of the prawns; they both came with a heavy (hoisin?) sweet spicy sticky sauce reminiscent of my weather description in paragraph 1 (great example of predictive alliteration there) — it was a bit much for the delicate stingray, but in terms of taste it really hit the spot. The ingredients were obviously very fresh, and while the heaviness of the sauces wasn’t enormously subtle, it was still delicious.
When in Singapore, one inevitably misses a good, diversified wine selection, and the various open reds we had weren’t all that great — at some point, you just decide to stick with cocktails, which can be decent enough if you manage to talk the bartender into mixing in an adequate amount of booze. Oh, and don’t forget to make sure, if you’re with a large group, that your guests pay their own damn bills, to avoid embarrassment at the door. Again, they were good mighty good sports about it, but not without some hefty negotiation.
Oosh
http://www.oosh.com.sg
2 Dempsey Road
Singapore 249679
info@oosh.com.sg
+65 64750002